Live Well Strategy #22 - What is NORMAL for you?

Sometimes, due to days filled with simply crossing of items on our “to do list” (i.e. being “busy”, stressed) rather than connecting with our purpose, we can start to feel that it is normal to feel tired, lethargic, un-enthused about life…however this is NOT normal.

“What is normal to you is enthusiasm. What is normal to you is laughing a lot. Many, many times a day. Feeling strong and secure. Feeling so much self-confidence, so sure about whom you are that when you look at others you’re always in a position to uplift them.

What’s normal for you is to have so much energy that at the end of the day you are still looking for things to do. Having such a passion for life that you’re eager to get together with other people to hear about what they’re doing, to see if it’s anything that might want to turn a little of your attention to. To have so much energy at the end of the day, that you’re already eagerly planning tomorrow. Feeling disappointed that the sun goes down and enthusiastic that the sun comes up.

What is normal is a zest for life beyond anything that most of you, over eight years of age, have remembered or felt in a long, long time. That’s what’s normal.”

From The Science of Deliberate Creation – Abraham-Hicks Daily Planning Calendar and Study Group Workbook, pg 765

THIS is what life is about – feeling enthused and full of energy. When ever I start feeling tired, un-enthused and a lack of energy, I do TWO things:

1. Sit down and remind myself of my purpose – and of the things I feel great doing. I ask myself – am I doing something today towards my purpose (what I’m here for) and what makes me feel great doing*. For example – helping people achieve balance in their lives and teaching dance/ZUMBA® are two of the things that make me the happiest AND where I know part of my purpose is. So…what am I doing TODAY towards my purpose and what makes me feel good? Even something TINY each day will make you feel on purpose, balanced and enthused. And, remember, it’s when we’re the happiest that we are most useful to everyone around us.

2. Connect with people that make me feel good – people who I feel uplifted around, who make me laugh, who support my dreams and aspirations and who I feel great around (and hopefully I do the same for them).

*If you don’t know your purpose – ask yourself when do you feel the most alive? What could you do for hours without pay? What activities do you do that when you talk to others about them, you just glow? These questions will help uncover some of the things that you're meant to be doing MORE of in your life.

NOW…Ask yourself:

• What can I do TODAY to connect with my purpose and what I LOVE? 
• What 1 little thing can I do everyday? (Do 1 thing ever day).
• Who can I connect with that I feel GOOD around?

Live your life connected to your purpose and feeling good – EVERYDAY. What if it’s your last day? Your best and most meaningful days will be when you are connected to your purpose and connecting with others

Be Happy... Be Vibrant...

Live Well,

Carmen

Live Well Strategy #20 - Don't Assume Anything

(I'm resending/posting this with the correct YouTube link :-))

A couple of years ago I did a NIA* Blue Belt Training in Portland, Oregon – which was an incredibly moving (no pun intended :-) and “applicable to everything in life” experience.

The week long training opened up with 4 Allies for physical, emotional, mental and spiritual growth – and one of the most interesting ones was “Don’t Assume Anything.”

This statement invites us to be silent in our mind and eliminate any stories we create in our heads about people, situations or conversations. To be like a fascinated child, curious about a person, or what is being said, without making assumptions or "making up" who you think the person is, or what is being said. We were asked to “practice” this and the other 3 Allies throughout the training.

Not easy. I was AMAZED at how many stories I could create in my head about people, situations and conversations and conversely, when I waited, listened, and observed – I would come to a much different, and usually more loving and constructive, conclusion.

What I learned: When in doubt, or when you have a STRONG reaction to anything, observe and listen longer than you would normally, ask questions and gather information rather than telling yourself stories. Keep inner dialogue to a minimum.

The results: It improved my relationship with everything – people around me, myself and even to learning. I stopped finishing people’s sentences (by listening and not assuming anything, I would actually realize that is NOT what they meant). I had more compassion for people as I learned about them before "neatly putting them in a box”. I was more compassionate with myself as I listened and waited to see what my initial reactions (physical or emotional) to situations were all about.

Now this can be heavy stuff, and I am SUCH a huge proponent of learning with fun, emotion and laughter. So, watch this wonderfully moving YouTube video. Notice if you have any “assumptions” come up when you first start watching it. Then empty your mind by telling yourself “Don’t Assume Anything.” That’s when the magic happens :-)

Action Step: “Don’t Assume Anything” this week with people, conversations or situations. Listen, watch, wait…notice what different conclusions you can come to simply by not making up stories in your head before learning more.

*NIA is an absolutely beautiful mind-body-spirit movement practice that combines the dance, martial and healing arts. Similar to martial arts, NIA has belt levels and the Blue Belt is the 3rd level. The Blue Belt focuses on Relationships, Intimacy and Communication and how it relates to teaching, dance, music, ourselves and others. I have been teaching NIA since 2001 and weave it into my Zumba classes as well as it is an incredibly transformational movement practice – and so great for your body and soul! For more information and classes in your area: www.nianow.com

Be Happy... Be Vibrant....

Live Well,

Carmen

Live Well Strategy #19 - Craving Balance?

What helps create balance in your life?  A sense of grounding and center for you personally? 

 

When we do certain actions, eat certain foods, take time for ourselves, give to others, experience life in the present moment (rather than worrying about the past or the future), or do something that we love…we can center and ground ourselves on even the busiest day.

 

Over the past month I have started noticing what helps me feel more centered (or less :-)), and on the days that I feel scattered, I purposely do at least one thing that helps “pull me into my center.” Using your own inner wisdom (the answers are always in you :-)), let’s look at what grounds you.  I’ll give you some examples to help your ideas start flowing…

What do you love doing with friends or family that centers you?  An example might be preparing a meal and sitting down and eating together.  I have found that preparing food with friends/family with my HANDS is very grounding for me.  Which is the perfect segue for the next question…

What foods ground you?  For me, I always eat a large green salad (kale, spinach, romaine) everyday as I have found that “green” foods balance my brain and my mood.  And who knew that spinach and or romaine lettuce taste great in USANA Nutrimeal shakes?!  Look out for Live Well “Green Food” recipes coming soon :-) 

What places ground you?  Personally, as soon I enter a bookstore, like The Tattered Cover, I feel centered, grounded and “at home.”  Palm trees and beaches also ground me immediately.

What personal “rituals” center you?  Lighting candles at night, playing a personally designed “iTunes playlist,” meditating or just sitting in silence a couple of times a day (am and pm) can all be extremely centering.  

What can you let go of that definitely DOESN't ground you?  Saying yes to everything (just say no :-), being constantly busy, stressing, procrastinating (saps energy) etc.  I personally had to practice saying no to taking on more things in my life...but wow did it pay off :)
What TWO other things ground you personally?  Often, what grounds us personally are the simplest things that are unique to us (laying on the floor grounds me immediately).

Discover the many things that center you and incorporate at least one thing into your daily life.  Know yourself and take charge of your life.  Every day is your own, create life… make each day a yummy, precious day :-)

Be Happy... Be Vibrant....

Live Well,

Carmen

Live Well Strategy #17 - Looking Back to Move Forward

I've learned over the years that while it can be easy to set goals for the future (2011), it's just as important to commemorate and celebrate all we did in the past (2010).  I first heard of this idea from Cheryl Richardson, author of "Stand Up for Your Life," five years ago and have been doing it ever since. Look back first, commemorate & celebrate yourself...and then set your goals for 2011. 

What does this do?

1. It helps us remember the years as they fly by... and they're going faster and faster, don't you think? I remember last year when I did my "2009 Highlights" and then looked back at my 06, 07 and 08 highlights, I said to myself, "I did that? Wow, I totally forgot about that!"
   
2. It pats YOU on the back and helps you realize how much you DID do, even if there are still many things you want to accomplish in 2011.  It puts you in a "grateful" state of mind, rather than a "guilt-full" state of mind for anything that you didn't accomplish.  And which is a better state of mind to set goals/enter 2011 in?  We have LOTS of time to accomplish all we what we want to do and it's so important to recognize ALL that you did do last year. When you look at what you DID do and then set your goals from that mental state, you'll feel empowered, excited and positive.
   
3. It helps you "close" 2010 and embark with renewed energy for 2011. Energetically this is very powerful....

So what is the best way to do this?

1. Use the simple categories below to jot down the highlights of last year. Feel free to add or eliminate any categories applicable to the life you want to create - these are just the ones I use.  Cut and paste them into a word document.  You can do this NOW very briefly to get you going - don't think, just write down 1-2 things in each category that come to mind - go back and fill in more later.
   
2. Have fun with it - do it yourself or with family, a significant other, partner, etc.  This is a great thing to teach children* as well - to remember, celebrate...and then set goals.
   
3. Celebrate ALL that you did and then set your goals in using the same/and or additional categories.  SAVE both documents for future reference.
   
4. Enjoy! I love doing this every year...one of my favorite things to do between Christmas and New Year’s! 

2010 Highlights (then I do the same for my 2011 Goals)

• Purpose
• Business/Work
• Fitness
• Health
• Nutrition
• Zumba Classes
• Personal Development
• Spirituality
• Finances
• Home/Location
• Friends
• Family
• Charity/Giving Back
• Travel
• Fun stuff
• Cultural
• Material
• New Restaurants
• New Books
• Accomplishments & Achievements
• Things I've learned

*One the most significant events in my childhood was hearing a 50 year old man speak about setting 100 goals, and that by 50 years old, he had achieved 80% of those goals he had written down as a young man.  I have been writing down goals ever since then and it has helped create my whole life.  Goal setting is so important and should be taught in schools.  It's not, so it is something we need to teach the upcoming generation.

P.S.  For those of you who have been doing this with me for the past few years... here is something I received last year from a Cheryl Richardson email, which can add another element to the exercise.  For new Live Well Members and Clients - just do the 1st exercise and then add on if you like :-) 

Excerpts from "Bon Voyage 200_!"  by Cheryl Richardson

1. If you had to pick a theme of growth for 200_, what would it be?  What did you most need to learn?  What changes have you made that let you know you got the lesson?
   
2. What one thing are you still beating yourself up about?  Are you ready to do what it takes to put an end to this hurtful behavior?  Okay, then.  What do you need to do right now to get started?
   
3. What did you accomplish last year that made you feel good about yourself and how did you celebrate?  If you didn't celebrate, what will you do this week?
   
4. How was 200_ perfect for you?  What happened, good or bad, that forced you to wake up and see your life with clarity and truth?
   
5. Finally, as you think back over the last year, take some time to think about the people who influenced your growth - the ones who hurt you and the ones who supported you - and, in your own private way, thank them for their contribution to your life.  Get ready for a "Mighty Fine 2011!"  

Take Action Challenge:

Between Christmas and New Year's, or over the next week, while things are still fairly quiet and calm, take some time to answer the above questions in a notebook or journal.  Use this ritual as an opportunity to say goodbye to the past and hello to a bright new year.

Be Happy...Be Vibrant...

Live Well,

Carmen :-)

Live Well Strategy #14 - The Power of Dance, Joy and What Moves YOU!

“We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once.” –Friedrich Nietzsche

This commercial was shot at the Liverpool Street Subway Station in London on Jan 15, 2009.  Only the dancers knew what was happening; the general public didn't have a clue what was about to unfold.  This YouTube video had over 2 million hits in 15 days!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQ3d3KigPQM

When you watch this video, notice what moves you or makes you smile.  Is it the men in suits busting out in dance? The joy on the faces of both the dancers and the general public?  The group of people having fun and doing something spontaneous?  Is it the sense of connection among seemingly random people? (We’re all connected :-)).

I have personally found that what moves, touches, or inspires us is usually what we need to create MORE of in our life. Articulate what you loved about this video in one sentence.  Then ask yourself, how can you do one thing TODAY to create that in your life.  How could you do it tomorrow? How could you do it the next day? Connecting to what moves us on a daily basis helps bring meaning, purpose and fulfillment into each day.

For me, dance is one the things that moves me the most and is the reason why I don’t let one day go by with out dancing at least once (even if it’s in my living room :-)) What is it for you? What puts a smile on your face? This is your life NOW... not next year, not tomorrow. When you do something that moves, touches, or inspires you at least once a day you'll not only change your vibration in the present moment, but you'll also naturally start attracting more of what you love into your life.

Be Happy....Be Vibrant...

Live Well,
Carmen :-)

Live Well Strategy #11 - Perfectionism vs. Enjoyment

As adults, it’s very hard for us to not be “perfect” at what we do.  That’s often why we don’t try new things, stay in our comfort zones, don’t play “full out”, or even just enjoy the process while we’re learning. What if we look silly, what if we got hurt, what if we don’t look good?  

I was a classical pianist when I was a teenager. I played every day for 2 hours and performed/competed in music competitions and was fairly good.  However, after high school I stopped practicing regularly and went from being a good pianist…to definitely "a not so good pianist." If I sat down to play a song, I would make a lot of mistakes. So I stopped entirely. Even though I have a gorgeous baby grand in my living room, I didn’t enjoy not playing well.  And heaven forbid anyone asked me to play for them – not a chance.  Then I would look really incompetent.

However, recently, I started wanting to play again. I sat down, and made a zillion mistakes with a song I used to know by heart.  Some friends asked me to play for them – no way.  Then I heard my own voice one day talking to my Caliente Zumba students…"Don’t worry about getting the routine correctly, just have fun, as long as you’re moving – it’s all good! When you start to “let go” and stop worrying about what you look like, that’s when it comes.  Come to 3 classes and be willing to feel awkward initially – after 3 classes, muscle memory will kick in and your body will start to move naturally in it’s own rhythm…you’ll start to feel your own groove.”

What if I did that with piano?  What if I sat down and played to enjoy, not to hit notes perfectly?  What if I got into the emotion of the song and forgot about playing the wrong chords?  And most importantly, what if, when someone asked me to play, I did it for my own enjoyment, rather than “performing” for them?

Wow – what a change.  I now sit down and am present in playing.  I enjoy the emotion of the music, the sensation of the keys under my fingers, the sound of the melody and the rhythm of the left hand.  And after 3 times of doing this…I even started making less mistakes.  Oh, the power of listening to our own advice to others… :-)

So, how does this apply to everything to everything we do?

1. What did you enjoy as a teenager that you could start doing again?  I recently was talking to one of our Live Well Coaches in Denver and she has started singing again – she used to love that as a teenager.  For me, playing the piano again has brought a lot of joy and ironically, with my new approach, is also a great stress reliever :-)
   
2. What areas of your life are you "less than perfect at" right now, that you could stick with, through the learning process? A new fitness class, presenting a seminar, falling off the health wagon... they all apply.  Dive in, get back on the wagon and be willing to go through the learning curve.  The ONLY way we get better is through doing.  It’s perfectly normal to crawl and fall down before we walk, or run for that matter :-) 
   
3. What new skill are you currently learning that you could just enjoy the process with?  Forget about looking good or being perfect – how could you just enjoy the journey?  For me, it’s speaking in front of 10,000 plus people – so I focus on enjoying it, giving to the audience, “going towards the roar” and having FUN with it.
   
4. What do you not do because you don’t want to look incompetent or silly? Practice not caring. Some of the people I most admire are those that just dive in, regardless of what they “look like”. When I teach my dance classes and see someone “free dancing," not caring what they look like – I know they’re going to be great at dance.  It’s all about letting go and not being attached to how you look – but to how it FEELS. Just have FUN.
   
5. What if you applied this to your whole life – stopped being so hard on yourself, enjoyed the process, had fun, and even risked looking silly sometimes. Enjoyment versus perfectionism has the power to change your whole being and gives permission to people around you to do the same thing.

Your action plan for this week:

1. Do ONE new thing that you may not be perfect at when you first try.  For example, all my clients that have promised you would try Caliente Zumba but haven’t yet – this Live Well Strategy is for you. I know why you haven’t come yet :-)  Of course, anything applies though - look for something that you know takes you out of your comfort zone.  Practice not caring if you look "less than perfect" – it’s liberating, trust me.
   
2. Choose one thing that you’re currently learning and focus on enjoying the process, not the outcome (i.e., the joy of playing the piano rather than how it sounds to others.)

And my commitment to you, if you ask me to play the piano, I will.  I may still be a little nervous…but that’s the point isn’t it?  Feel the fear and do it anyways…and have fun. :-)

Be Happy... Be Vibrant...

Live Well,

Carmen

Live Well Strategy #9 - The Decision Making Process

As a life, health, and business coach it seems that the topic of making "tough" decisions regularly comes up - and in each area :-)  Making decisions can be difficult because it usually involves giving up something. That's what makes it hard — there can be a sense of loss to deal with, uncertainly of the future and confusion whether you are doing the right thing – especially if there are other people involved.

The following are 7 strategies that I use when faced with tough decisions – business, life, purpose, relationships – all the big stuff. Each strategy can help you get in touch with what is right for you – to hear and listen to your inner voice and intuition.

1. Journal. Write down your feelings without censoring anything.  This can give you incredible clarity– especially if you commit to writing every night or morning for 1-4 weeks.  The key is to write without censoring any of your true feelings…so if you’re concerned about privacy, journal on a password protected word document. Write in “stream of consciousness mode”.  Write anything comes up – anything at all – fears, feelings, pros, cons, etc.
   
   
2. Ask for input from friends and family that really know you, have your best interests at heart and want to see you happy.  Asking for advice is a great way to look at all angles and viewpoints – especially if your friends/family have the above characteristics.  Talking to those close to you allows you to really explore your concerns - even just hearing yourself talk can give more clarity.  Your friends and family can also play the "devil's advocate" and/or point out patterns they've noticed over the years.    
   
   Therapists or counselors are great additions/alternatives as well. Of course, remember that any advice you hear is useful “input” and but that it’s most important to listen to your inner voice and do what is right for you – no one knows the whole situation or what is exactly right for you, except for you.
   
   
3. “10 minutes, 10 weeks, 10 years” - Suzy Welch’s decision making formula from her book “10-10-10”.  How will you feel about your decision (try your decisions on for size) in 10 minutes, 10 weeks and in 10 years?  I love this formula.
   
   
4. Listen to your body. Our body always knows. How do you feel about the decision (again, try it on for size).  Relief?  Tightness in the body?  Nausea? Lightness?  What is your gut feeling?  
   
   
5. Notice Your Dreams. Dreams are very powerful because they contain important clues about our real feelings - subconscious thoughts that may not yet have come to the surface during our waking moments.  To help you remember your dreams, keep a notebook and pen by your bed and write down your dream/s as soon you wake up.
   
   
6. Give yourself space to decide.  While I’m a big believer in “Going Towards the Roar” (facing whatever you are scared of),  sometimes space around a decision (instead of a "knee-jerk" reaction) allows you time to really know (feel) what the best decision is for you.
   
   
7. Spend silent time in nature or sit and breathe/meditate. This is probably the truest way to really know what is the right decision for you (along with how your body feels). When you are alone and still – your real feelings can come to the surface because they aren’t drowned out by distractions or noise.  Allow yourself to know what is right for you, what honors yourself, your life, your truth and others.

Know that you do have the answers inside.  It’s sounds so cliché, but you always do. You and your body know… and if you allow yourself time to FEEL your way to your decision, you will make the right one.   

Be Happy... Be Vibrant...

Live Well,

Carmen

Live Well Strategy #6 - Bringing & Finding Joy on a Daily Basis

Ancient Egyptians believed that upon death they would be asked two questions, and their answers would determine whether they could continue their journey in the afterlife. The first question was “Did you bring joy?” The second was “Did you find joy?”
 
What a great way to live life – with these two questions in mind.  This is the reason that Live Well International was created ...loving what we do everyday and positively affecting others in their health, prosperity and relationships - bringing others joy!
 
I think this video will start off your day with lots of joy... AND I have a strong feeling the person in this video is bringing and finding joy on a daily basis :-)
 
Click here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlfKdbWwruY&feature=user 

Be Happy... Be Vibrant...
 
Live Well,
 
Carmen

Live Well Strategy #4 - Is What You’re Doing TODAY Worth a Day in Your Life?

A good friend of mine called the other day to tell me about a quote he had seen framed on a wall while showing a property to one of his clients.  What a GREAT question to ask ourselves every day, “Is what you’re doing TODAY worth a day in your life?”

So how do you make every day of your life worthwhile?  By bringing joy, passion and purpose into what you do every day.  And how do you do this?  These are the three things that have worked for me.

Step #1  Right now, write down 3 things that you LOVE doing.  Decide that once a day, you are going to do something that pertains to one of those things.  For example, I LOVE dancing and anything to do with dance.  So everyday I do something that incorporates dance like choreographing 30 seconds of a song, listening to music that I could use, dancing madly in my bedroom, or just looking at a magazine that talks about dance or fitness. 

You may have 5, 6, 7….20 things that you LOVE doing.  List them and be sure to do something related to at least one at least once per day.  This is an extremely important way to bring JOY into your life each and every day.  Make time for it – this is YOUR life – you are meant to be doing what you love – even if it’s only for 5 min per day ☺

Step #2  Decide what ONE of your long term goals is.  For example, let’s say that you want to run a marathon.  Then decide that once a day (put it in your planner) you will do something to move you towards that goal (researching how long you need to train, making a plan, buying running shoes, etc.)  Take baby steps that make you happy - working up to doing something once a day.

Step #3  Do something nice for someone else once a day.  Pay for the person’s cappuccino (or green tea ☺) behind you in the line at Starbucks, buy a friend’s lunch, take a friend to a movie, loan someone a book you love, call a friend out of the blue just to say hello, have a REAL conversation with the person behind the service counter, genuinely compliment someone, offer to help. 

Did you know that it not only gives you and the recipient joy – but also any observers?  The "observer" of a kind act derives as much benefit as the giver and receiver.  What an EASY way to positively affect 3 people – who will then go on and affect others.

So...do something you LOVE every day, one thing that takes you closer to your goals/purpose and something nice for someone else.  Joy and passion will then naturally happen everyday.  Try it, it works!

Make EVERY day meaningful – it’s YOUR life after all ☺  You're the author...

Be Happy...Be Vibrant...

Live Well,

Carmen ☺

Live Well Strategy #2 - The Law of Attraction

It works like this: “Your thoughts and beliefs lead to emotions, and these emotions drive your behavior. Ultimately, these thoughts and emotions cause their physical equivalents to manifest in your life and your body.” – Dr. Christiane Northrup, MD, Newsletter, Premier Issue

So how do you create your ideal life, business, body, and relationships?

STEP 1: Focus on what you WANT, not on what you don’t want. Or another way to put it - focus on what you PREFER, not on what it is now. Isn’t that an interesting concept? What you think about the most, with the highest degree of emotional intensity - either good or bad - is what you will attract into your life.

As Napoleon Hill says in his famous book Think & Grow Rich, “Thoughts have the peculiar quality of becoming their physical equivalents.” Your life right now is result of your thoughts and focus in the past. A preview of your life in the future is what you are focusing on today.

So, if you continue to think about how your life is NOT working, how your body is NOT what you want – you will continue to manifest the same thing. Instead, focus only on how you want and prefer your life, business, body, and relationships to be.

STEP 2: Your thoughts determine your emotions – how you FEEL – and then your feelings drive your behavior. For example, if you are feeling down or stressed and you eat that bowl of ice cream, it will definitely not manifest what you want.

However, when you think about good things or do things you love - that thrill you - you start FEELING good. And when you FEEL good – you start doing things that support your goals. You start allowing what you want into your life. When you feel bad, the opposite happens.

So, always look for ways to feel good. What could you do right now to feel better? Call someone, go for a run, or dance like crazy in your bedroom! It truly is a simple as that – always look for a way to feel good, focus only on what you want and start creating what you prefer in your life.

Be Happy.... Be Vibrant....

Live well,

Carmen